Fruit Salad

Once it’s summer, grocery stores get a surplus of perishable fruit. To keep it all from going bad they put it all on sale. In a move that I assume most of your parents do too, my mom  buys a lot of this sale fruit. While it is great to have fresh fruit in the house, there is one issue: the fridge is more fruit than any other food. The fruit bowl becomes a Jenga tower of fruit and the crisper drawer in the fridge can barely close. What do you do with this much excess fruit? Make fruit salad!!! (duh)

I have had many a fruit salad in my time, so I have some incredibly strong opinions on fruit salad; stronger than they reasonably should be. Firstly, apple should be the building block of a good fruit salad. Apples are the lettuce of fruit. That being said, they should make up no more than a quarter of the salad. While the apples may be most of the salad, the secret star is the grape. They should be sprinkled throughout, like croutons should be, making the bites with them special. Finally, watermelon should be added only minutes before consumption. While fruit salad is already a watery affair, adding the watermelon early causes it to become soupy and all taste like watermelon.

After those spicy hot takes i’ll let you cool down with this recipe for fruit salad!!! (exact amounts and ratios are up to you):

Apple

Orange 

Pear

Watermelon 

Cantaloupe 

Strawberries

Blueberries

Grapes

Lemon juice (just a tad)

Sugar (only a pinch)